True (to) Self

It's widely reported that authenticity is one of our deepest psychological needs. In pursuit of 'being ourselves' we come face to face with some tough decisions and at times self-awareness 'fatigue'. Considered the cornerstone of mental health there are correlations between choosing authentic living and our levels of vitality, self-esteem and coping skills. Knowing our motives, emotions, preferences and abilities supports authenticity. Acting in ways congruent our values and needs regardless of criticism and rejection is 'being true to ourselves'. Less likely to turn to drugs, alcohol or self-destructive habits when we are true to who we are. More likely to have satisfying relationships, a strong sense of self-worth, confidence in challenges and ability to follow-through. Those low in authenticity are reported to be defensive, suspicious, confused, and easily overwhlemed. Many of us experience the vague dissastisfaction, sense of emptiness or self-betrayal that comes with conformity, being agreeable for the sake of it or toeing the line.

How is it then, with all the benefits noted, that it's still painful to be authentic? Brutal honesty, without our biases of ourselves, can be cringeworthy. It's not always nice to see where we really fit, and 'fail'. Others may reject us, inevitably some will. The freedom of authenticity comes at a cost, it's tiring, and at times tiresome, constantly evaluating your decisions against your values, strengths, likes and dislikes. It takes practice, patience, pause, contemplation, reflection, experiementation. Uniqueness, individual thinking, works against conformity and makes it hard for us to see 'where we fit in'. Wisdom, insight and creativity are the prize.

Challenging assumptions about what is necessary in life, what we must and have to do, what we should be doing and what we shouldnt opens the door to authenticity. Being true to our hearts and heads is not, however, for the faint hearted.